World Diabetes Day…again

Today is World Diabetes Day and to be honest I’m flat.

The fire emergency here in Australia combined with higher blood sugars have kept me from my usual enthusiasm. But it’s not just that. It’s hard to put a positive spin on diabetes all the time.

All I can say is my daily yoga practice pulls me out of the doom and gloom. It reminds me that as much as I like to get lost in the details around my health management it’s never going to be perfect. Control is necessary but there has to be some wiggle room. Giving myself a hard time isn’t productive. I’ve learned to relax in the tougher poses, to breathe deep and find stillness. These mini lessons are perfect metaphors for the ups and downs of this disease. And believe me I need that right now.

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Today marks the birthday of  pioneer Frederick Banting and as such celebrates the discovery of insulin in 1921. Before 1921 they didn’t even know what insulin was. Every time I think of this I’m gobsmacked. 1921 is not that long ago yet I take so much for granted when it comes to all the available medication and tech. Here in Australia there is subsidy for our medication and equipment. I am stunned that this isn’t the case in other countries. No one should have to pay for life saving medication!

Luckily there is an initiative out there to help those in need. Its called Type 1 International and their mission is to support local communities by giving them the tools they need to stand up for their rights so that access to insulin and diabetes supplies becomes a reality for all.

Please join me today on World Diabetes Day in supporting this wonderful organisation.

See you tomorrow #NDAM #DiabetesAwarenessMonth

with great respect…

rachel

Diabetes is an opportunity

It’s burning in the hills behind the town where I live in Australia. I am grateful not to have to evacuate but am concerned for those who do. The entire valley all the way to the beach is in a blanket of smoke. It’s hard to breathe. We just went to the beach for some relief but there was none. It was strange to see people out and about in cafe’s and shops as per normal. Apparently it’s only going to get worse. So many more friends are leaving their homes to be safe. It’s heartbreaking.

I feel this way about Diabetes too. Even though I live with it myself I feel for every single person who lives with this condition. It’s heartbreaking when anyone is diagnosed. I know all too well the challenges ahead. Every day can feels like Russian roulette. It’s a massive learning curve and you can’t get away from it.

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In spite of all the feelings that come up after diagnosis I also see diabetes as an opportunity to live differently. Instead of taking things for granted I wake up each day grateful to be alive, I’m learning through yoga and other modalities to regulate my nervous system, to react less to the stress of variable blood sugar levels. My diet is refined and I maintain an active life. This kind of approach takes focus and sustained effort and there are plenty of times where I feel frustrated and defeated.  But I try not to let my down days take over. I have always been an enthusiastic participant in life.

Today as the smoke chokes the air around us I think about all the people all over the world in crisis. How do we rise above, stay resilient and not give up in the face of uncertainty? How can we make a difference in spite of circumstances beyond our control? I draw strength from a simple Ayurvedic principle.

You can’t fight fire with fire. The softness of water is what douses the flame.

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The softness of water is about slowing down, tuning in and calmly moving forward. Flowing with change rather than pushing against it. Connecting with water is about dispersion and delegation. In the face of disaster it’s coming together in community and supporting each other. If we all share the burden we’re stronger together.

It’s the same with diabetes. When I reach out into the diabetes online community I find like minded friends managing their health in myriad ways. All of this forms my pool of inspiration. Even better is going to a support group or event where we all meet and share. I’ve learned more about my condition from these brief in person events than I have from my doctors and diabetes educators.

Knowing there is a community out there to answer a question, share a technique, help me find the best product or device is priceless. Before diabetes I would never have outsourced, researched or informed myself in this way. Diabetes has literally inspired a whole new me. My mission for diabetes awareness month is to share from the heart how diabetes affects me personally but its also about sharing how yoga is an incredible balm.

In this very difficult time, no matter what the struggle, it is my prayer that the varied practices and teachings of yoga become an important part of the healing journey.

More on that tomorrow…  #NDAM, #DiabetesAwarenessMonth

with great respect…

rachel

The perfect injection

I was one of the lucky ones, or so I thought. When I was diagnosed with unusual blood sugar levels in 2008 I was told by my doctor that we would take a wait and see attitude. Waiting meant me measuring my blood sugar levels with a glucometer twice a day and having quarterly blood tests to see if there was either a reversal to normal levels or an escalation. Seeing was about hoping that I could reverse the symptoms through diet and exercise.

Looking back I’m not to sure how this ‘wait and see’ approach made me lucky. ‘Waiting’ meant I could go into further denial and ‘seeing’ took me into untold distress. When my doctor finally made the call  to start insulin therapy after acknowledging that what I had was a late onset form of Type 1 diabetes, I cried for two weeks straight. Not because I was worried or fearful (which by the way I was, no one wants to be dependent on medication for the rest of their life) but because I was relieved. Relieved that I had a diagnosis that made sense and that I would have control of my health again.

Up until that point taking insulin was my biggest fear. How would I travel having to carry meds with me everywhere, what if I reacted to the chemicals in the insulin, what if it didn’t work.? My doctor assured me that I would feel a whole lot better once I started injecting. He was right. It took 6 months for my levels to return to ‘normal’. Insulin doesn’t cure diabetes, or solve the problem, but it does alleviate the issue of not being able to assimilate food . When the body doesn’t produce an essential hormone you have to get it in there somehow.

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One of the first things I learned from my diabetes educator was to rotate injection sites. The reason being if I constantly inject in the same place that area starts to form scar tissue making it harder to absorb the insulin. Also the injection site changes the rate of absorption. I started by injecting in the fat layer on my belly, then after meeting friends who lived with diabetes I learned to inject in the fat tissue on the sides and lower back. Recently I’ve started injecting in the top part of my bum. I still haven’t worked up the courage to try my upper outer arms or outer thighs, but I’m getting there.

The hardest thing to remember is where I last injected so I switch sides. Left side of my belly in the morning and right side in the evening. Basically I feel like a pincushion covered in bruises. I like to think of them as a battle scars, a fight well won. Those bumps and bruises show me I’m still alive. I don’t begrudge taking insulin one bit. Taking insulin is a privilege. Before the discovery of insulin, diabetes was a death sentence.

What I’d really like to see out there in terms of help in rotating sites is some kind of way to make sure I’m injecting in a different spot each time. I’ve seen an idea for a temporary tattoos for kids  and there’s a grid you can use, plus apps and charts. But to be honest all these options hasn’t solved the issue.  One of the best options I’ve seen is placing a teeny tiny temporary flower tattoo after injecting, so eventually your whole belly looks like a garden. Sounds fun right?

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In spite of the daily dilemma I have around injecting, life goes on. Initially, I felt nervous and awkward, and unsure as to whether it would work at all. It was my doctor who reassured me, “you know in a little while you’ll forget you even struggled with this part of it. It’ll be as automatic as driving a car.”

And you know what? As much as injecting can be a literal pain in the ass, he was right. As I dial up the dose and inject that sucker I know everything is going to be okay.

see you tomorrow

with great respect…

rachel

It’s not up to me

Setting myself the task to write something every day for 30 days about diabetes to spread diabetes awareness is definitely daunting. I live with diabetes for 365 days a year and deal with it 24/7 so it should be easy to articulate that right? In reality the way I deal with diabetes is deeply private.

After spending 6 years ignoring it and then spending 4 years shouting about it via writing a book and being a fierce advocate through social media, it’s been interesting to spend this past year taking a break from the need to externalise my experience.

In 2019 I set a goal to lower my Hba1c, heal some of my underlying digestion issues and be brave when it comes to taking Insulin. I started 2019 using the Diabetic Health Journal, created by yogi and  diabetes health coach Lauren Bongiorno, with incredible results. Writing down daily goals, things I was grateful for and staying accountable made a big difference. My Hba1c went from 6% to 5.6 % in 6 months. If you’re not sure what that means it’s like dropping your cholesterol levels or blood pressure. Moving it from a pass to a win.

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I also went into hyper drive with my digestion, adding different supplements, bone broth and more variety into my daily meals. I worked on stored trauma with network spinal analysis and neuroimmunology sessions. Finally I made sure to keep up a daily walk and my twice daily yoga practice.

Making a concerted effort to shift some deep seated patterns has been an interesting process. I didn’t necessarily make great strides or have major revelations, instead I settled more into accepting what is.

“What is” might not be what I want but if I can accept it that’s a pretty good place to be. It’s how I dealt with diagnosis after fighting it for so long and pretty much how I manage my finicky digestion and volatile blood sugars and everything else that comes my way.

My latest go to phrase for everything is, ” It’s not up to me” That’s not about not doing everything I can to stay balanced. It’s about understanding that I don’t know the recipe of creation.  Letting go of needing to know, enjoying the gifts I’ve been given and trusting that whatever comes is perfect, goes a long way in helping me manage my condition.

I never expected to be diagnosed with diabetes but now that I have been I can honestly share it’s a blessing in disguise.

More on that tomorrow  #NDAM #DiabetesAwarenessMonth

With great respect…

rachel

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6 tips to bounce back from a rebound high

The first time it happened I was clueless. People living with diabetes often talk about blood sugar roller coasters but I thought that just meant highs and lows in a short period of time. What I didn’t understand was that when I go low I also go high and not just right after correcting a low blood sugar. The high lasts for days. My body starts resisting the insulin I’m injecting and I need more insulin to manage the highs which means more risk of lows. When I was a kid I hated rollercoasters and for good reason. They made me feel sick, scared the begeezus out of me and I’d come off the dang thing with a sore throat from screaming my lungs out.

It took quite a few hypo’s for me to work out that the high’s that followed were to do with the lows. At first I just thought there was something wrong with the insulin, or maybe I hadn’t dosed enough. I even speculated that maybe my pancreas had finally hit the dirt and I really didn’t have an ounce of beta cell function left. Because I live with LADA ( latent autoimmune diabetes in adults) I still produce a minute amount of  insulin, this means that sometimes my body squirts out a tiny amount when I first start eating. It also means that if I am already low when I start eating I could go even lower and have a hypo. Not having the recipe as to what my pancreas will do when means there’s a lot of guessing going on. So when I’m high for days on end and doing everything exactly as I did it the days, weeks and months before it feels like I’m in the middle of a crap shoot. Lucky me!

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When people meet someone living with diabetes, the decision making and daily micromanagement is largely invisible. You might see a CGM or an insulin pump, but on the whole it seems as though the whole process runs smoothly.

Here’s what actually goes on most days for me. I wake up, inject. I eat, inject. Go a little below range, take a glucose tab. Go high, take some insulin.  I check my blood sugar every hour to be on the safe side except for at night where I place my faith in morpheus, the god of sleep trusting that the amount I take for my long acting insulin will keep me in range all night. 20 fingerpricks and up to 6 shots a day of insulin is not easy or seamless no matter how doable it is.

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What do I do to deal with the physical and mental blood sugar challenges during a rebound high? Here’s 6 things that have really helped me.

  1. Do some physical exercise which I know increases insulin sensitivity, like a walk with some hills,
  2. Do a yoga practice which works with the larger muscles of the body and includes standing hip openers and balancing postures
  3. Talk to myself in a positive and supportive way when I see a high number on my meter. I.e. This too shall pass, this is a normal response to a low blood sugar, everybody goes through this
  4. Do things in my day that give me joy, like writing, yoga, connecting with a friend or have some hang out time with my husband
  5. Go to bed early, there’s nothing more healing then a good nights sleep
  6. Reach out in the #DOC ( diabetes online community) to find out how my diabuddies deal with the same situation

And if you live with diabetes I’d love to know… How do you deal with a rebound high? Lets start a conversation in the comments below!

See you tomorrow #NDAM #DiabetesAwarenessMonth

with great respect…

rachel

The subtlety of things

I’m not really a subtle person when it comes to speaking my mind. In fact, I’ve been told on many occasions that I inherited my bluntness from my mother. It’s taken me years to find a way to finesse my words and still more often than not my foot ends up in my mouth.

When I’m teaching a yoga class those moments of bluntness make my students laugh but in my personal relationships it can be a sticking point. When I think I’m being tactful, it’s the opposite, major faceplant!

In spite of my inability to be subtle when speaking my mind, physically I’m the opposite. I’m super sensitive. It’s like the filter I don’t have when I speak fails me when I’m out interacting in the world.

Being super sensitive though is not the end of the world. In fact, when I sit down to do my yoga practice it’s a gift. I find it easy to settle in to a quiet space and sense the subtle changes in internal energy. It helps me to feel when I am either in or out of balance, so I can feel more focused throughout the day.

ana-maria-berbec-8Ne7XGuvGuM-unsplashAs a yoga teacher I love sharing with my students how to access the subtle body. We think of ourselves as our physical bodies but who we are is actually the subtlest of the subtlest.

Put simply if we can comprehend that a human body is made up of cells, which when observed in minute detail become invisible vibrating particles, it stands to reason that what appears as solid and real, might not be.

It’s what we can’t see, feel or even understand which is informing everything. Luckily the yoga tradition has specific Sanskrit words to describe the unseen. Words like Prana (life force) and Nadi (energy channel) to name two.

When we start to grasp the finer aspects of experience, i.e that we are made up of vibration and that energy is not confined to one body, one mind etc. there is a possibility for greater compassion and acceptance. And this where I segway into my life with diabetes.

The most challenging part of living with diabetes for me is its subtlety.

jukan-tateisi-bJhT_8nbUA0-unsplashI cannot see the problem. i.e. it’s not a condition where I can look inside my pancreas locate those non-functioning beta-cells and restart the motor. Ironically someone asked me if there wasn’t some way I could do this just last week.

So being a subtle, invisible condition that I have actually no clue how to truly manage I have had to find ways to accept and be kind to myself. I find that simply sitting quietly before and after my physical postural practice is a great time to do this.

It might be just a few minutes where I recognise that the whole process of existence is out of my hands. Understanding that diabetes isn’t personal so why not let existence carry the burden? A few moments of stillness gives me an immense sense of freedom.

Another beautiful way to be self-compassionate is by practicing the “Inner Smile” meditation. This was shared with me by my teacher Alan Finger and sweetly offered recently on Facebook by one of his teachers in Perth, Tamara Graham .

I thought I would share her guidance here too as when we smile and laugh we drop all our stress and worry. I mean who do you have to be when you’re laughing?

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To begin the practice…

“It starts with a smile. Just think of something that naturally brings your smile. Feel the smile’s sensations.

Resting your eyes, let them gently close.

Feel how when you smile it’s more than just your mouth. Feel how it feels on your face.

Experience the sensations of the smile on your lips and your tongue, in your jaw, in the roof of your mouth, your cheeks, cheekbones, temples, your eyes, around your eyes, your forehead. How does it feel in your skull, your temples?

And just like magic now, move the feeling of the smile into your throat and upper body. Let it sparkle down your neck, shoulders, arms, hands and fingers.

Feel the gentle smile spreading in your chest and upper back, down through your torso, your spine, into your abdomen and lower back, move the smile into your pelvis, your hips, your two legs, your two feet and all ten toes.

Smiling even deeper inside you, visualise the smile moving through your nostrils, down into your lungs and into your heart.

Feel the sensation of the smile into your oesophagus, belly laughing its way into your stomach, into your liver, to your navel and your small intestines. Move the smile around your belly so your large intestines are smiling, so your whole abdomen’s smiling, move the smile into your reproductive organs and into your pelvic floor.

As you breathe, feel the smile sliding through all your organs and all of your nerves into your skin. Feel your whole self-smiling. Everything smiling together.

Sense your skin from inside and as you notice there’s no sharp boundary between your skin and the air around you, feel the smile glowing through you and all around you, into an aura of joy.

Sit as long as you like in the radiant aura of the smile.” –Tamara Graham

With great respect…

rachel

P.S Click this link Tamara Yoga to find out more about my friend and all that she shares from our Ishta Yoga tradition.

Rebalance your digestion with Ayurveda

Something I’ve struggled with since my diagnosis is digestion. In fact, before my diagnosis I was already sensitive to a variety of foods. No matter how many different kinds of treatments and doctors I saw nobody could actually tell me what was wrong. Once I knew that I had diabetes it all made sense. Higher blood sugars had contributed to yeast overgrowth and leaky gut. Luckily my knowledge of Ayurveda was a great starting point to rebalance and reboot my digestion. That’s why I am super excited to share with you a guest blog today by Nicole Young the founder of Three Harmony on how to recognise when your digestive system is dangerously compromised and how to rebalance it. Take it away Nicole

belly-3186730_640Proper digestion is key to a healthy life and maintaining a strong Agni (digestive fire) is essential. It is not only the way we digest food, but our emotions and thoughts as well, how we process stress, our lifestyle and environment. Ayurveda believes that the root cause of every imbalance and disease starts with improper digestion.

When the body is under stress, the soft tissues and channels are affected or constricted creating narrower passageways for the body to function normally and allow nutrients to become available to every part of the body. This creates blockages and Ama can build up in weaker areas. Over time this Ama could be a contributory factor to causing many serious illnesses.

The difference between Ama and toxins is that Ama is the undigested food residue and waste that forms a sticky sludge which is toxic and difficult to remove from the body, whereas toxins can be anything from the chemicals found in our food and environment to the stress responses in our body which can also create harmful chemical reactions.

Here are some signs and symptoms that you may notice when your digestion is not working properly:

  • feeling of tightness or discomfort in the abdomen
  • indigestion/pain in the stomach after eating
  • suffering from gas and bloating
  • abnormal bowel motion (diarrhoea and constipation etc.)
  • blood/mucus or undigested food in stool
  • haemorrhoids and anal bleeding
  • inflammation in the body
  • restless sleep, fatigue, general heaviness
  • headaches or migraines
  • skin conditions
  • thick coating on tongue

So what can done before this gets any worse and it becomes the possible cause of a more serious illness like an autoimmune disorder such as ulcerative colitis, rheumatoid arthritis or diabetes.

A one to three-day digestive reset is a good place to start – this is where you will eat a mono-diet of a food like Kitchari (dish made with rice, mung dal and spices) or a bone/vegetable broth to cleanse the bowel and allow the body to start to heal itself. After the specified number of days, you can slowly introduce foods that are easy to digest making sure to reduce pitta aggravating foods for a while, especially nightshades, spicy/hot/sweet/sugary foods etc. and increasing those that are cooling and calming in nature.

natalia-figueredo-350529-unsplashI personally have suffered from UC (ulcerative colitis) an IBD (inflammatory bowel disorder), but have been able to self-manage this IBD and self-heal naturally without having to take harmful pharmaceuticals for the rest of my life. A disease my gastroenterologist told me was incurable.

So after many years of suffering and not wanting to take any more drugs/products or try different health practitioners and diets/tests/treatments, I did my own extensive research.  You should be sure to check that what you are reading is in fact true as there is so much conflicting information on the internet from people who are not really qualified to give it. Question everything, even your doctor’s advice because they may not be of the belief that healing is possible, even when it is, and they may only be able to offer specific advice and related drugs/products that are in their area of expertise or beneficial to their practice. You may find that this is just not enough to heal the body, especially if you want to do it naturally, and that things will work for some people but not for others – genetics and location certainly play a part too.

This is what has generally worked for me:

  • dietary changes
  • specific herbs and foods such as:
    • stress and anti-inflammatory support – magnesium, ashwagandha, curcumin, chyavanprash, herbal teas etc.
    • gut healing remedies – bone/vegetable broth, aloe vera juice, coconut oil/water, kefir, probiotics, fermented vegetables, digestive enzymes, clay, psyllium husk, liquorice root etc.
  • keeping to a routine
  • extra sleep when my body is digestively challenged
  • practising regular yoga for digestion
  • practising meditation to keep my state of mind balanced

I have also found this book very useful in relation to better understanding the digestive system, various digestive disorders and more specific suggestions on how to recover from them – Restoring your Digestive Health by Drs Jordan Rubin and Joseph Brasco. It has become a great reference guide for me when I’m digestively challenged.

And once you’re starting to feel better, it’s really important to keep on strengthening your Agni – here are some Ayurvedic tips for good digestion:

  • eat at the correct times of the day
  • eat warm/cooked foods
  • avoid cold/raw food
  • avoid chilled drinks while eating
  • avoid incompatible food combinations
  • use fresh, seasonal, organic ingredients
  • eat slowly and chew your food properly
  • have a calm and balanced mind
  • bathe before eating

Ayurveda plays a huge part in self-healing and I would also say that local food and indigenous plants in your area are really important as well because the microbiome in your gut will be assisted during the healing process if you include these in your diet. After all, your body is a reflection of your natural local environment.

Hippocrates said “Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food

Nicole Young - Three Harmony

Nicole Young is the founder of Three Harmony, a Melbourne-based Ayurvedic consultant, Yoga teacher, writer and online educator.  She is deeply passionate about traditional medicine and self-healing with Ayurveda and Yoga.

www.threeharmony.com.au

 

A little goes a long way

Oatcakes it’s been a while. A long while, I don’t think I’ve even so much as looked at you since 2014. 2014 was when I read Dr. Bernstein’s Diabetes Solution, learned about the benefits of low carb eating, the law of small numbers and laid down my carb habit for what I hoped would be forever. So far, it’s worked well… but there have been some issues.

The biggest one being my ongoing food intolerances which includes reacting to seeds and nuts. Cutting them out of my diet has meant less flow in the plumbing department and it’s starting to bum me out. (literally!)

Over the last three days I’ve been reintroducing oats into my diet. Day one I took ¼ of an oatcake, which made me a mucous ball. It didn’t deter me though. Day 2 I had ½ a cracker and my blood sugar pretty well stayed stable. Day 3 I lashed out and had a whole 4.7 carb of a cracker with my egg and avocado brekky, took the same amount of Insulin as always (1 unit) and watched my blood sugar go up up and away.

I did crack open a fresh pen, could it be that? Not sure…because yesterday I had too much insulin and went low.

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I also made a post into the DOC to get advice and someone suggested I try switching up the timing of my bolus. Someone else said I should eat fat with fat and carbs with carbs to get the dose right.

To be honest I am actually terrified to add more carbs into my diet because I am still working out how to manage my lows. At the same time my goal for this year is to be able to eat a broader range of foods and to be relaxed around food. I’d like to feel comfortable eating out, eating in… whatever.

It’s been super interesting to observe my attitude change towards my blood sugar levels since I’ve nailed my A1c goal. I used to see a spike and be like, “oh well, try again next time” I had a no sweat attitude because I didn’t realise how important it was for my health to have better time in range. But now after nearly 6 months of flat lines and what I perceive to be excellent control a few days of peaks and troughs has me completely agitated and freaked.

Not a good look for someone who is touting the mind calming benefits of yoga. If I can’t maintain my cool during a breakout experiment with an oat cracker well what the F…k?What Sarah Said BlogDiayogi Sarah Macleod, shared in her latest Instagram post that non-judgement, one of the attitudes we can adopt through our yoga practice, is about stopping ourselves from labelling a blood sugar level as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. In other words, practice with the attitude of going for the best outcome while letting go of the end result.

Not so easy for a type A like myself!

As a few days have gone by since I started writing this post I ended up invoking the principle of flexibility from my yoga practice to help me work up to adding foods into my diet.

When I go into a yoga pose and feel challenged and inflexible I initially hold back from forcing myself in the pose. I watch my breath and wait. After about a minute I can feel all my muscles soften, then I can creep deeper into the pose. A little bit of movement actually takes me a long way.

So even though I was keen to get going with oats, I’ve stopped taken a breath and adopted a wait and see attitude. Oh and I added psyllium husks into my diet instead ( a great low carb option) and wouldn’t you know… a little goes a long way….

with great respect….

rachel

Rachel Portraits 2015-40

dialling up the dose

I’m getting braver when it comes to taking fast-acting Insulin. My insulin to carb ratio has been 1:30 for the last year but that seems to be shifting. Either that or I’ve upped my carbs enough to need more. After nearly 6 years of nothing but greens, I’ve added butternut pumpkin, carrots, apples, and the occasional sweet potato.

My whole life I’ve been told that I need to eat sweet foods to stay balanced. Before my diagnosis, warm veggie root stew was my staple. The first 6 years post diagnosis I managed to keep my levels in range with a low carb diet. The first thing to go was bread, then pulses and eventually all grains. I got really good at making bread with sesame seed or almond flour until I overdid all the seed and nut flours too, ending up with even more tummy issues. Before I tried insulin, I had a very narrow corridor of foods that I could tolerate.

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Starting Insulin has made things easier but being sensitive I haven’t been able to leap back into pancakes even when they are made with low carb ingredients. It seems my body wants simplicity when it comes to food. So, in spite of my desire to go wild, eat whatever and cover I’ve been building back my gut flora and adding foods in and out in cycles to see if I can tolerate them. Some things have worked, like butternut pumpkin and carrots while other things like cabbage, kale and brussel sprouts haven’t.

It’s been frustrating and disheartening at times, knowing that in choosing to ignore my diabetes I damaged my digestion.

My husband, who has very simple needs when it comes to food always shares that the body needs food, it doesn’t need a particular type of food. It’s only me, the one eating the food that has a desire for something special.

Food is a language and I’ve become conditioned into that language developing a taste for the foods I like. In reality, food is sustenance.

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Part of what the deeper teachings of yoga have brought to me is a way to be with my condition with compassion. The other day we walked into a health food store with rows and rows of delicious things. Things I know my body will react to if I eat them. Rather than get despondent or feel angry I felt a quiet acceptance. Reminding myself that I had 42 years of eating whatever I wanted. If I needed to avoid those foods so I have a more relaxed tummy so be it.

In the words of the Rolling Stones, “You can’t always get what you want.”

As my journey into my 11th year with diabetes continues I am still coming to terms with this condition. I’ve shared before on the blog that my endo wants me to get to the point where managing my diabetes is so ordinary that it’s as easy as brushing my teeth and that I no longer panic about changing the amounts of insulin I need, that I trust my body and its ability to work with the medication.

I agree that I need to have a healthy attitude towards insulin, but I also feel I need to stay alert, check my blood sugar regularly and be sensitive to the timing of doses, exercise, and changes in my routine. I like to think of my life with diabetes as an adventure but at the same time have a good back up plan. For me, that’s the winning combo.

with great respect…

rachel

P.S I’d love to know your winning combo…comment below. It’s beautiful to learn and grow together.

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Subscribing to the Unsubscribe

It’s tragic, that moment when my inbox flags that someone’s unsubscribed from my newsletter. I know it’s not personal, but it is.

Feeling the inevitable gut punch when I post a newsletter is something I’m getting used to. It’s why I find it harder and harder to send them out and truth be told I’m a little envious of my unsubscribers. I’d like to do some unsubscribing myself

Like unsubscribing from Type 1 diabetes.

IMAGINE

It’s 6 am. I roll out of bed and pad to the computer, As I watch the myriad of newsletters come in the subject, “LOW BLOOD SUGAR” is staring me down. I click through the dropping numbers and glucose tabs to the fine print. Who wants low blood sugar in their inbox anyway? Not me. With a quick click, I’m done. PHEW!

One less newsletter to worry about until breakfast.

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The inevitable ping reminds me my next newsletter has arrived. This time the subject line reads, “BOLUS for BREAKFAST”. Again I scroll down to the teeny-weeny lettering and click the unsubscribe link, only to be led to a page which offers me numerous other ways to resubscribe

Bolus for Lunch ✅

Bolus for Dinner ✅

Basal for Bed ✅

Inject for a High ✅

I go through the process of unchecking all the boxes and BOOM no more bolusing for anything!

I feel an incredible sense of relief until I realize, I’ve got another mail. That annoying one where I have to manually write to the person and ask them to personally unsubscribe me. The subject reads, “Unknown Reason for High”.

As I write a diatribe to the person for not taking me off the list I find myself confessing, “Don’t you know I’ve tried everything already? Why can’t you just make sense? It’s no use showing up if you’re just going to be irrational.”

Blah Blah Blah

While I’m at it I rage unsubscribe to everything.

A bird flies overhead, the Sun rises and sets. The wind blows through evergreen trees and I feel calm again. I’ve tamed the beast and lived to tell the tale.

Now wouldn’t that be nice…

With great respect…

rachel 

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