Don’t ignore the Signposts

Disclosure: This post is brought to you by Nuffnang and Priceline Pharmacy

I’ve thought a lot lately about the events that led up to my diagnosis. There were signposts but I’d ignored them. Like the fact that my great-grandfather, great uncle and grandmother all had type 2 diabetes. My great-grandfather died from diabetes before there was insulin and my great uncle controlled his blood sugars with diet. My grandmother was diagnosed in her 80’s not long after, she passed away.

As a young child I remember thinking that out of all the diseases, diabetes seemed like the worst.

In Australia 1.7 million people have diabetes. It is the leading cause of preventable blindness and kidney failure requiring dialysis. Heart attack and stroke increase by up to four times with diabetes and there are up to 4,400 amputations every year. 500,000 cases of type 2 diabetes go undiagnosed and 280 people develop diabetes every single day!

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The statistics are not only staggering they’re frightening and make me want to run a mile. Before my own diagnosis, it was easy for me to think that that could never be me.  I was super healthy and fit. I never had to think that my lifestyle might be putting me at risk.

Initially, the doctors thought I had prediabetes. I was told to switch to a low glycemic diet and to make sure my exercise was more cardio based. After three months of hard work, I expected good results. Instead, my levels didn’t comply. Further testing revealed the source of my diabetes was autoimmune and that I had LADA. Latent Autoimmune Diabetes in Adults.

Back then I didn’t bother finding out more about diabetes. As long as I didn’t have symptoms I told myself I’d be fine. What I didn’t know is that symptoms aren’t the only marker and symptoms don’t appear straight away. The complications of diabetes can appear much much later.

If I had been able to get blood tests and health checks at my local pharmacy, I am sure I would have been better informed and more prepared for my diagnosis. Most of us don’t go to the doctor until something’s really wrong and then it could be too late!

iStock_000038440118_FullWhen I heard about Priceline Pharmacy’s new incentive to have trained diabetes advisors in their stores to evaluate people’s risk of developing type 2 diabetes and provide handy tips to avoid it, I was heartened. The first time I had to pick up test strips at my local pharmacy. I was mortified. The person behind the counter knew nothing about my condition. As someone who lives with diabetes 24/7, I want to know that the people in the pharmacy are trained to know the signs, symptoms, and needs of someone who lives with diabetes.  To me, Priceline Pharmacy’s new initiative fits the bill. Their mission is to help people manage their diabetes, be it type 1 or type 2, through being experts in the field, providing education, support and the sale of diabetes consumables.

I love that they asked me to get behind this initiative and to share how important it is to screen for diabetes. I’ve often shared on the blog about my ups and downs. I’m a real person just like you trying to do my best to live with this condition. Any kind of professional support that’s easy to access in my opinion is a bonus.

If you live in Australia I urge you to head over to your local Priceline Pharmacy from 29th September – 25th October to get your FREE diabetes consultation at priceline.com.au/mission-health. Available in store.

with great respect…

.rachel

What brings me to my knees

When I was pregnant and about 6 years into my yoga practice I was asked to start a prenatal yoga class in my local town.  Looking back, I am amazed that everyone survived. I was inexperienced, teaching from a book and making grand claims about how the pain we were experiencing while stretching our legs was exactly like childbirth.

Then I gave birth. The pain was unimaginable and nothing like a hamstring stretch. How could I have been so blind!

Today after my second low blood sugar in two weeks, I feel like that.

Up until three weeks ago, I was a novice. Sure I’d had a few numbers teetering on the edge, but like a graceful dancer about to fall in her first performance, I’d somehow catch myself just in time and leap away with the perfect smile.

But yesterday brought me to my knees.

I’d woken up at 3.30 am with a perfect 5.5 mmol (in diabetes land we call that a Unicorn). I knew it would be better to get up, make myself a snack and get into the day than toss and turn and worry about a low.

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After completing a few administrative tasks and enjoying the efficacy of working before dawn, I took my morning basal dose (long-acting insulin). I’d been working the different spots on my tummy to avoid potential pitfalls. I.e. popping a blood vessel and injecting straight into a vein, and was trying a new technique to spread the skin rather than pinch so the needle didn’t go in too deep.

The needle went in without a hitch, I depressed the plunger and then waited for a count of 10. When I pulled the needle out there was a huge drop of blood and I could see a hard bubble forming under the skin.

Instead of panicking I decided that eating consistently all day would help to keep my levels on track. I enjoyed having a bigger lunch and a few extra snacks. Things were looking good. I’d stayed balanced for most of the day.

Then I took my 2nd Basal shot

I prodded my belly again for the perfect spot. Primed the needle, sunk it in and then… oh… no… ANOTHER BLEEDER! I stayed calm. This time there was no bubble and no mark. It was going to be fine

I happily made my dinner, ate my desert and headed to the computer to do a few tasks before a scheduled online evening meeting with one of my yoga students. I felt a strange itchy sensation on the right hip and just to make sure I wasn’t going low, checked my level.

2.6!!!!!!

Two friggin . 6

The shock of it was worse than the feeling. In fact, I felt absolutely ZERO, nada, nothing! I felt totally normal…I screamed, and my husband came running. We were on repeat (see my last blog). He’s telling me to breathe, stay calm and I’m chugging juice. He reminds me (like he did the last time) I really don’t need to drink the whole 250 ml.

2.6? I’m drinking it!

Then I sit on the couch and wait. My heart has stopped pounding and everything feels surreal.

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I feel sad. I’m sad for babies diagnosed at birth, for the mothers and fathers who get up all through the night to make sure they stay alive. For all the people in the world without insulin. For the adults like me who are diagnosed after a full life who now have to grapple with their new circumstances. For the lack of awareness and understanding that accompanies this disease. For the injustice from pharmaceutical companies who use diabetes for profit. I want to strangle someone, scream and pound the wall. But I’m actually too spaced out. I check my blood sugar every 5 minutes and gratefully watch the numbers on my meter rise in slow steady increments. When I hit 5.5 I relax.

I had no idea, I don’t know what I was thinking…. but I had no idea

Slow steady breaths definitely helped. Stretching out on my mat the next day also helped. Putting my hands together at my heart at the end of my practice just that little bit longer to acknowledge the absolute precious gift of life… that’s helped as well.

But really I don’t know how we can ever recover from the circumstances we find ourselves in until there is a cure. As someone said recently ” Insulin does not solve the problem”

So what does?

Knowing I am not in this alone and that there are millions just like me, doing their best to meet the challenges every day with courage, strength, and grace!

If you’d like to make a difference in the life of someone living with diabetes please consider donating to any one of these amazing charities.

Beyondtype1,  We are Diabetes,  The Betes,  T1international,  Diabetes Sisters

DIY Yoga

I’m someone who learns on the fly. When anyone ever asks me how I learned to do anything in the age of the internet I’m not shy to admit I google. Just yesterday my publisher asked me for a fact sheet. What the heck is a fact sheet? So I googled… now I know what a fact sheet is!

A few days ago I watched a webinar on how to create a Facebook group. In the first 5 minutes, I was introduced to Liz and Jean and given this scenario. What If I could win a million dollars by assembling an Ikea bed in 30 minutes. If you’ve never bought anything from Ikea bear with me.

noah-ark-ikea A million dollars? That could come in handy right ?

So here’s the thing… Would I hire Liz? pictured in a foreman’s hat with a clip board, Liz is an expert in Ikea bed assembly. Or would I rather be Jean? pictured with hands pressed heavily into her temples and looking worried and try to do it myself.

Which would you choose?

It would make sense to hire Liz if it meant winning a million dollars. But here’s the thing… If I can master something that seems almost impossible it means I can do anything. And that includes managing my life with diabetes. The more obstacles I can overcome the more capable I feel. So when I master something like MailChimp,  MailChimp for me is like trying to assemble an Ikea bed, I feel like super woman!

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It’s the same with my yoga practice.

When I started yoga we didn’t have google. There was just me, my mat and a book called ‘Light on Yoga’ by B.K.S Iyengar. In the book, Mr. Iyengar, one of the modern fathers of yoga, demonstrates poses that look near impossible to execute. But being young and enthusiastic I tried them anyway. And slowly with determination, I mastered each pose and birthed my first home practice. Having a daily appointment with my mat, instilled discipline, self-care and the ability to feel into what was needed.

So even though I encourage my students to come to class, I’d actually rather they had a home practice. The more you can motivate yourself the better you’ll feel about yourself and your ability to do anything you set your mind too.

Today’s yoga practice for the online yoga challenge, Better Diabetes Management in 7 Steps with Yoga has been all about simple moves to increase circulation, something you can do at home every day. If you’d like to join us it’s not too late just head here

with great respect…

Rachel

Grateful I am alive in spite of diabetes

Yesterday I did my first presentation for Yoga teachers on how to meet the needs of someone living with diabetes in a yoga class. It was a long and carefully thought out presentation. I wanted to cover a landscape which is unknown, often treacherous and has, to be brutally honest, no happy endings. At the end of the session, I opened it up to the audience for questions.

The first one?

Do you see what’s happened to you as a blessing?

I am sure the look on my face said it all.

Having a baby was a blessing
Meeting my husband was a blessing
Discovering yoga… a blessing

Type 1 diabetes? Not so much…

Later when everyone else had left she stayed behind. She was curious to know how I had come to terms with a condition that obviously was not something I chose or even wanted?

I shared that when I finally comprehended that I had type 1 diabetes, (it took me 6 years to find out that that was what I had) I felt relieved. Finally, I had an answer to the varied and confusing symptoms that not one health practitioner or medical doctor seemed to understand. But understanding what was wrong with me didn’t mean that relief translated into silver linings and rainbows.

It reminded me of when I was little and my mom used to try to get me to swallow a pill. I used to hunker down, screw up my face and flat out refuse. I’d rather die than swallow one of those damn things. So instead I’d take medicine in liquid form, or a suppository or even a skin cream.

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Eventually, though that damn pill didn’t come in any other form and I had to face my fears and swallow. It took guts, willpower and a lot of love and encouragement from my mom to take that pill.

Now I swallow like a pro.

That’s how it felt when I finally let go and accepted my diagnosis. I swallowed it whole.

And I still do….

Every day I wake up and roll with the punches…

Like today when my reading is higher than I’d like it to be and I know that it’s better to accept than fight. So I do my yoga practice…and smile at my husband because he has my back

…and take as much time as I need to be grateful…

Grateful I am alive in spite of diabetes

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What if there was an easy way to feel better, have extra confidence and be more relaxed about managing your diabetes?

Yoga absolutely helped me and I’m convinced it can help you too

Join me on September 1, 2017 for my free yoga challenge

”  Better Diabetes Management in 7 steps with Yoga”

With great respect…Rachel

Obviously I love Yoga

Blogging about Diabetes isn’t always easy. Sometimes I find my momentum waning. Like this week, when my email crashed and my camera wouldn’t load data onto my computer and my blood sugars decided to go up for no known reason.

I guess what I am trying to say here is that even though I want to quit… diabetes never does!

I find it fascinating to think that this disease has been with us for who knows how long. In India, they’ve been treating diabetes for over 5000 years!

When I went to India, just after my diagnosis (literally 3 days after) the cook at the retreat center where I was staying worked diligently with me to keep my blood sugar in range. Back then we didn’t know it was type 1, but the things she did worked. I ate something called Bitter Gourd every day, drank potions, modified my diet and massaged myself daily with sesame oil, Abhyanga, to relax my nervous system.

One of the most challenging things for anyone who has to mimic the action of their own pancreas is to keep stress to a minimum. Those initial days in India helped me to establish a daily routine with food and exercise…Yoga being the biggest support.

Like everyone else, it’s not easy to stay motivated, I find that when I step onto my mat it takes a few moves before I’m in the zone. I can’t say I directly notice an instant effect on my blood sugars from the practice but I do believe it trickles down. Overall my levels are stable and manageable because the practices of yoga enable to me to relax and be myself.

Obviously, I love yoga!

Goa Shoot (12 of 18)

What if there was an easy way to feel better, have extra confidence and be more relaxed about managing your diabetes?

Yoga absolutely helped me and I’m convinced it can help you too

Join me on September 1, 2017 for my free yoga challenge

”  Better Diabetes Management in 7 steps with Yoga”

With great respect…Rachel

 

Dancing with Diabetes

This last month has been all about my obsession with Ballet. It started when I was in the airport on my way back to Australia and Misty Copeland’s, Life in Motion miraculously leaped off the shelf and into my hands for the long flight ahead. Reading about her incredible talent and rise to stardom amidst a very unstable home life and her detailed descriptions of a life in Ballet, brought back vivid memories of what it was like to live and study dance in New York City during the early 80’s.

Back then I was an aspiring Ballerina and spent every spare minute either attending dance classes or watching the greats in American Ballet Theatre and New York City Ballet. My own career in dance lasted well into my 30’s. I never made it to a big company, ( I danced with a regional dance in education company in Tasmania), but I did get to taste what it’s like to perform day in and day out.

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Don’t let anyone tell you that dancing is glamorous. It takes grit, hard work, and guts to do all that graceful stuff and nerves of steel…not only to face external criticism but one’s own nagging self-doubt, fear of failure and much more.

Initially, when I was diagnosed with diabetes, I tried to dance down my blood sugar levels. I’d wake up, head to my yoga room, blast out music and thrash about for 20 minutes hoping for the best.  It worked quite well in the beginning stages when I was still producing quite a bit of insulin but later, not so much. After a while, any kind of exercise raised my levels and depleted my adrenals and sadly I stopped dancing.

Reading Misty’s book made me wonder. Are there other dancers out there who live with Type 1 Diabetes?

Enter, Zippora Karz, a former ballerina with the New York City Ballet who was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes just as her career was taking off within the company. Lucky for me she is also a writer so to continue my passion for all things Ballet I couldn’t help devouring her book, The Sugarless Plum. It’s such a great read and perfect for anyone living with type 1 diabetes who also loves all the intrigue of the Ballet. I soared along with Zippora as she realised her dream of joining the company, and then crashed when she was diagnosed, misdiagnosed and re-diagnosed again. Her journey to health and wellbeing is remarkable, her courage unshakable and her persistence in living her dream in spite of the many challenges and unknowns awe inspiring. Can you tell I love this book!

So after a month of watching videos of Ballet, reading about Ballet and thinking seriously about attending an Adult Ballet class, I decided it was time to digress from my usual yoga for diabetes topic and share with you a short interpretive dance about what it feels like sometimes to live with diabetes.

I’d love to know how you find creative ways to manage the many emotions that arise in a life with diabetes so feel free to comment below…

With great respect…

Rachel

The worst visit ever

I’m sitting here in the airport in Johannesburg after 10 hours of non-stop flying. With a couple of hours before my next flight, I have time to share my 3rd post for Diabetes Blog Week 

Having diabetes often makes a visit to the doctor a dreaded experience, as there is invariably bad news of one kind or another.  And sometimes the way the doctor talks to you can leave you feeling like you’re at fault.  Or maybe you have a fantastic healthcare team, but have experienced blame and judgment from someone else in your life – friend, loved one, complete stranger.  Think about a particularly bad instance, how that person talked to you, the words they used and the conversation you had.  Now, the game part.  Let’s turn this around.  If you could turn that person into a puppet, what would you have them say that would leave you feeling empowered and good about yourself?   Let’s help teach people how to support us, rather than blame us!

My GP had always been a cool guy. Into alternative things, he swam with dolphins, played the didgeridoo and always recommended herbs before meds. I’d been seeing him on and off since my son was born and we had a nice friendship outside of the doctor’s office.

The day of my diagnosis was just like any other day.  I’d been feeling fatigued, dizzy when I ate sweet things and my ex-husband had suggested we both get some blood tests. He’d gone to see the doctor first and was told that he had high blood pressure, but the news about me was way worse. The doctor wanted to see me straight away. “What do you think it could be?” I asked him. “Well I know it’s not Cancer but it is something to do with your blood.”

Sitting in the waiting room that day I was jittery. It seemed odd that I was that unwell. I’d always managed everything holistically with my health, hence seeing that sort of doctor.

As soon as I entered his office he told me to sit down. He swiveled back on forth on his chair and tapped his pencil on my blood test result form. I don’t know how to tell you this…but the news isn’t good.

And then he just blurted it out. You have diabetes!

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I can’t begin to tell you how I felt, my heart rate went through the roof, the bottom dropped out of my world. Diabetes is everywhere in my family, especially on my mother’s side. In fact, my great grandfather died from diabetes ( he was diagnosed before there was Insulin) Ironically, My birth date is the date he died.

It was hard to keep track of what the doctor said next. He told me that he had seen that my blood sugar levels were elevated so he checked my A1c. Sure enough, that was elevated too. “It’s a long journey to reverse this, you’ll have to find your own cure. I’m not quite sure how you got this…”

Next, he’s started telling me that I had to change my diet and exercise more while shoving pamphlets in direction. Then as a parting gift, he told me to Google diabetes.

As I drove home I just couldn’t believe what he was saying. It couldn’t be diabetes.

I think things could have gone really differently that day and if they had I might not have gone on to deny my diagnosis. It took almost 6 years to have actual diabetes symptoms so it was easy to shove his diagnosis under the rug.

If he had sat me down and explained to me that the beta cells in my pancreas were attacking themselves and that it couldn’t possibly be my fault. If he had asked me if there had been some really stressful event that may have triggered the onset.  If he’d told me that there were resources and tools to help me manage this and a worldwide community for support. That I could live a full happy healthy life. That there were people just like me that I could connect with, who could mentor me through the little things. Even just a few words of support and encouragement could have made all the difference.

Luckily in spite of that god awful doctor,  I survived!  In a way, diabetes has grown on me. I no longer blame myself for getting sick.

After nine years of living with diabetes, a lot of yoga and study of traditional yoga teachings, I’ve realized that there is no ‘ rhyme or reason’  for anything. Rather the whole of life, whatever happens, whether we call it good or bad… is a reminder to enjoy everything exactly as it is.

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If you’d like to find out more about how yoga can help you manage your diabetes each and every day check out the rest of my blog and if you’d like to get the first chapter of my book for free go here

With great respect…Rachel

Why I dropped the ball

Hey there, it’s been a while! Firstly I want to apologise for the long break between blogs. I’ve been plowing through a few ‘moments’ in my life that have garnered my full attention.

Things like:

organising my book tour in the US

getting published in Elephant Journal

creating vlogs for Yoga for Fertility and Yoga for Adrenal support

hosting my parents first visit to South Africa

did I mention, marrying the man of my dreams?

and finally getting a printed advance readers copy of my book on Yoga for Diabetes, How to Manage your Health with Yoga and Ayurveda 

Here’s a little photo collage to put you in the picture….

Meanwhile, diabetes has been kicking my but!

I’ve been splitting my basal dose, upping ratios, wrestling with unexpected highs and lows and doubling down on my yoga practice to manage the associated stress.

Amidst all the celebrations, I’ve been dealing with a ton of fear. So much so that I found myself writing about it for Beyond Type 1, my favourite online yoga charity and community.

Here’s a little exerpt

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“Meeting my fear has never been easy. But slowly over time I’m getting better at taming the beast, especially now that I live with Type 1 diabetes.

My initial response to my diagnosis was to deny that I had diabetes. The theory being: what doesn’t exist can’t hurt me. It took time and courage to realize that the only thing standing in the way of me accepting my condition was fear.

Fear of hypoglycemia, fear of ketoacidosis. Fear of insulin. Fear of forgetting to take insulin. Fear of food, fear of what other people think about what I eat. Fear of getting fat or losing too much weight. Fear of complications. Fear of losing my livelihood. Fear of losing my relationships. And the biggest fear? Fear of dying. We all grapple with that one, diabetes or not…” read more here

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So… it’s been a crazy few months and I can’t wait for some sense of normalcy to return so I can keep sharing with you really great ways to use yoga to help you manage your diabetes.

….And I’d love to hear from you what kind of things you’d like to see more of on the blog.

Wishing you an absolutely beautiful day wherever you are!

with great respect

Rachel

Shame

This month is Diabetes Awareness month and today I wanted to share more about the vulnerability I experience while living with Diabetes.

I can remember the moment of diagnosis like it was yesterday. The feelings of confusion and disbelief as my GP hurriedly told me, “YOU HAVE DIABETES” There was no sugar coating, no silver lining and I was terrified and convinced there was some mistake. I didn’t get to see a specialist straight away so for at least two days I just sat in my house in tatters. I didn’t know what to do. The doctor had given me all sorts of instructions to change my diet, google diabetes and find out how to fix myself.

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I didn’t know whether to call my parents, tell my best friend or just be quiet about the whole thing. The biggest overriding feeling I felt was shame. I kept thinking how could a yoga teacher who was supposedly healthy get this disease. 8 years ago I knew nothing about type 1 diabetes and that it was possible to get this as an adult and that mine was a particularly slow onset.

At that stage I thought I had type 2 diabetes which can be brought on by stress, diet, lifestyle choices and other factors. The two diseases are very different. In type 1 the pancreas loses beta cell function and the ability to produce insulin. In type 2 the body does produce insulin but the cells resist the insulin. In LADA which is what I have, it’s sometimes called 1.5 which means I can do both. Not have much insulin and resist the insulin. This means I have to do everything I can to make my cells more open to receiving insulin and preserve my beta cell function at the same time.

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Understanding my disease was the first step in letting go of the shame I felt. When I was finally at the stage where I needed Insulin, the diabetes educator said in no uncertain terms that this disease is not my fault and that there is absolutely nothing I could have done to change its onset and progression.

The tears that flowed from that moment were tears of relief. letting go of my shame has helped me to be more compassionate too. Not one person living with chronic illness, mental health issues, personal tragedy or any other crisis should ever feel ashamed.

Things happen!

It’s up to us how we respond to our circumstances. I am grateful every day for the gift that diabetes has given me.

with great respect…Rachel

Want to know more about my first year on Insulin? Get my free ebook here.

Highs and lows

Friday was a biggie, not in terms of my blood glucose numbers, but because I’ve finally realised a life long dream. In November 2017 a book I had no idea I would even write, when I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes eight years ago, will be published worldwide.

If you’ve been following this blog over the last two years you’ll remember how busy I was last year writing Yoga for Diabetes Some of you even generously donated to the crowdfunding campaign I ran in February. I am beyond grateful for the outpouring of generosity from friends, family and people in the DOC.

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What I didn’t expect was to be approached by a publisher in the U.S after the campaign had finished and that our discussions over the last 7 months would lead to being offered a contract for world wide distribution. Obviously I couldn’t be more thrilled.

Prior to being offered the contract my plan was to have the book ready for print by May 2016. Being an absolute novice with self publishing I came up against all sorts of road blocks while sourcing quotes from printers. On the exact day that I received the best print quote I also received the contract offer from the publisher.

I have decided to go the traditional publishing route with the hope that my enthusiastic supporters from the crowdfunding campaign will celebrate this exciting turn of events, even if it means waiting a year to receive the book.

So the absolute high of the week? Signing that contract!

contract-signAnd the low?

Waking up up the next day with higher blood sugars. Heading to my mat hoping the numbers would fall. Turning up the dial on my nightly basal injection. Feeling sleepy, grumpy and frustrated because no matter what I do only trial and error will bring my blood sugar down again.

When I hit these emotional lows, the best yoga practice is one of surrender, acceptance and knowing that I can ‘try’ again tomorrow.

And what does that practice look like?

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I imagine myself at the feet of something greater and offer up my pain, frustration and sorrow to that force. I express absolute gratitude for the sweetness of life, the breath and this body, letting the emotions come.

This to me is the power of Yoga in the form of Bhakti. And one of the many ways I bring yoga into my daily diabetes management plan. No matter what your religion, culture or belief, surrender and gratitude are universal and a powerful daily practice.

with great respect…Rachel

And if you can’t wait for the book why not check out my free ebook on how I managed my first year on Insulin here.